By Father Rich Tomkosky
Saint Paul tells us, “Do nothing out of selfishness or vainglory; rather, humbly regard others as more important than yourselves, each looking out not for his own interests, but also for those of others.” Humility is recognition of our true condition of dependence on God and to accept that in a spirit of trust, surrender, and joy.
Saint Paul then goes on say his beautiful prayer/hymn to Jesus’ humility. Jesus is in the form of God but emptied Himself and took the form of a slave, being born in the likeness of men, humbling Himself, becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a Cross.
Jesus truly practiced what He preached when He said to us in the Gospel: “The person who humbles himself will be exalted and whoever exalts himself will be humbled” (Mt 23:12). But becoming more humble is a daily battle for us humans because the primary effect of original sin, from which we all suffer, is pride – as is so evident in the current era in our world with so many people fighting with each other because of the prevailing attitude: I won’t be disrespected (although we don’t have to be a doormat for others) – and won’t back down from anyone. It is a recipe for moral and spiritual disaster on the individual level and a destruction of any sense of the common good for all.
So how can we go in the opposite direction amid this wave of pride and selfishness and grow in the virtue of humility? First, we need to pray daily for this gift, to make Saint John the Baptist’s utterance our own, “Jesus must increase and I must decrease.”
Second, we need to have a proper love or esteem for ourselves. Not too much: conceit, a form of pride; not too little: despair, which is reverse pride. We need to honestly access our strengths and weaknesses of character in light of Jesus’s love and truth. So few are willing to do that today when people in their pride say outwardly: “I don’t regret anything.” Really, you fool?! Yes, we need to have confidence, but not in our own gifts and abilities apart from Jesus, but IN Jesus and IN His love for us. That is the source of our identity and “self-esteem.” We can’t act like we have no weaknesses – when that doesn’t correspond to reality!
God calls us to adopt the attitude of the publican rather than the Pharisee (see Luke 18:9-14): Be merciful to me a sinner, Lord; instead of comparing ourselves to others and thinking we are better or lesser than them. But we also need to admit that, yes, we are sinners! The only one we should be comparing ourselves to is Jesus!
If we can get out of the excessive self-esteem fantasy that our world promotes, starting in pre-school school and going all the way through the entitlement mentality fostered in college and graduate school – the most recent manifestation of this grave moral/spiritual error is the transgender identity confusion ideology (thinking in pride/despair we are in essence God who decides who is male and female or whatever else we just make up) – which is causing so much harm to young people mentally/emotionally and spiritually and leading to some even mutilating their bodies or even tempted/giving into suicide. Then we can experience the joy of knowing God’s love for us despite our sins and confusion; although, remember He calls us in love to change for the better, to grow in His likeness – but only with His help.
When we focus on Jesus more, we also start to become free of the enslavement of worrying constantly what other people think of us (the modern obsession with human judgments), and not in an arrogant way of saying and acting like: I have no regrets, and I don’t give a bleep what others think. No, as disciples of the living God we have the humility to want to set a good example for others, but what they think of us in the end really doesn’t matter because God alone is the One who is the Judge of the living and of the dead, which we acknowledge in humility rather than pride. If we please Him: it’s all good! If we displease Him, it’s all bad!
Finally, how do we know in fact that we are growing in humility? As Jesus says in the Gospel, by their fruits, you will know them. The fruit of humility is love. We grow to love God and our neighbor more deeply, in patience, even when we don’t feel like it; we are growing in humility if we stop justifying our sins. Tied into that, we know we are growing in humility if there is a desire in our heart to go to the Sacrament of Confession more frequently and to make amends for our sins. We know are growing in humility if we are truly concerned about our neighbor’s soul and offering daily prayer and penance for them. God bless you.
Father Rich Tomkosky is the Pastor of Saint Thomas the Apostle Parish in Bedford and Seven Dolors of the Blessed Virgin Mary Parish in Beans Cove.
Overview
Living Humbly in an Era of Immense Pride/Hubris and For the Conversion of Souls
By Father Rich Tomkosky
Saint Paul tells us, “Do nothing out of selfishness or vainglory; rather, humbly regard others as more important than yourselves, each looking out not for his own interests, but also for those of others.” Humility is recognition of our true condition of dependence on God and to accept that in a spirit of trust, surrender, and joy.
Saint Paul then goes on say his beautiful prayer/hymn to Jesus’ humility. Jesus is in the form of God but emptied Himself and took the form of a slave, being born in the likeness of men, humbling Himself, becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a Cross.
Jesus truly practiced what He preached when He said to us in the Gospel: “The person who humbles himself will be exalted and whoever exalts himself will be humbled” (Mt 23:12). But becoming more humble is a daily battle for us humans because the primary effect of original sin, from which we all suffer, is pride – as is so evident in the current era in our world with so many people fighting with each other because of the prevailing attitude: I won’t be disrespected (although we don’t have to be a doormat for others) – and won’t back down from anyone. It is a recipe for moral and spiritual disaster on the individual level and a destruction of any sense of the common good for all.
So how can we go in the opposite direction amid this wave of pride and selfishness and grow in the virtue of humility? First, we need to pray daily for this gift, to make Saint John the Baptist’s utterance our own, “Jesus must increase and I must decrease.”
Second, we need to have a proper love or esteem for ourselves. Not too much: conceit, a form of pride; not too little: despair, which is reverse pride. We need to honestly access our strengths and weaknesses of character in light of Jesus’s love and truth. So few are willing to do that today when people in their pride say outwardly: “I don’t regret anything.” Really, you fool?! Yes, we need to have confidence, but not in our own gifts and abilities apart from Jesus, but IN Jesus and IN His love for us. That is the source of our identity and “self-esteem.” We can’t act like we have no weaknesses – when that doesn’t correspond to reality!
God calls us to adopt the attitude of the publican rather than the Pharisee (see Luke 18:9-14): Be merciful to me a sinner, Lord; instead of comparing ourselves to others and thinking we are better or lesser than them. But we also need to admit that, yes, we are sinners! The only one we should be comparing ourselves to is Jesus!
If we can get out of the excessive self-esteem fantasy that our world promotes, starting in pre-school school and going all the way through the entitlement mentality fostered in college and graduate school – the most recent manifestation of this grave moral/spiritual error is the transgender identity confusion ideology (thinking in pride/despair we are in essence God who decides who is male and female or whatever else we just make up) – which is causing so much harm to young people mentally/emotionally and spiritually and leading to some even mutilating their bodies or even tempted/giving into suicide. Then we can experience the joy of knowing God’s love for us despite our sins and confusion; although, remember He calls us in love to change for the better, to grow in His likeness – but only with His help.
When we focus on Jesus more, we also start to become free of the enslavement of worrying constantly what other people think of us (the modern obsession with human judgments), and not in an arrogant way of saying and acting like: I have no regrets, and I don’t give a bleep what others think. No, as disciples of the living God we have the humility to want to set a good example for others, but what they think of us in the end really doesn’t matter because God alone is the One who is the Judge of the living and of the dead, which we acknowledge in humility rather than pride. If we please Him: it’s all good! If we displease Him, it’s all bad!
Finally, how do we know in fact that we are growing in humility? As Jesus says in the Gospel, by their fruits, you will know them. The fruit of humility is love. We grow to love God and our neighbor more deeply, in patience, even when we don’t feel like it; we are growing in humility if we stop justifying our sins. Tied into that, we know we are growing in humility if there is a desire in our heart to go to the Sacrament of Confession more frequently and to make amends for our sins. We know are growing in humility if we are truly concerned about our neighbor’s soul and offering daily prayer and penance for them. God bless you.
Father Rich Tomkosky is the Pastor of Saint Thomas the Apostle Parish in Bedford and Seven Dolors of the Blessed Virgin Mary Parish in Beans Cove.